How to Stop Caring So Much (12 ways I care less)
The less I care, the better I do. I’m more creative, I feel happier and I live better. I just feel more stoked about everything.
A laid-back life is my modus operandi. It’s part of my identity, creative work and life philosophy. And I’ve noticed something — the more I let go, the easier things get and the less resistance I experience.
I can laugh at myself and at the triviality of things I deem so important. And in that process, I have more fun, improve my skills and actually reach success more easily.
Learning how to stop caring so much is a modern life skill. So this post shares my favorite ways to do that.
Now enough chit chat, let’s do this!
Table of Contents Show
What Does Caring Too Much Look Like? (the signs)
Caring too much can be subtle or obvious. But there are a few things I personally keep an eye out for.
Here are the signs that you or someone you know may be caring too much:
Recurring stress about too many things
Persistent anger or frustration
Reliving past moments
Worrying about the future
Worst-case-scenario thinking
Not recognizing your achievements
Only seeing the negatives
Perfectionism
Why Should I Stop Caring So Much?
Become happier
Stress and worry less
Enjoy the process more — less focus on the results
More clarity and better decision-making
Improved authenticity
Notice more unique connections and new or different opportunities
Become more objective
How to Not Care So Much (12 moves)
1. Focus On One Area of Life At A Time
What part(s) of your life do you care too much about?
Getting clarity around this question is a solid first step. Because learning how to stop caring so much is way easier if you just focus on one area of life at a time. For this, you have two main options:
Choose something important or urgent
Choose a smaller area of life
Focusing on a smaller area of life is a great way to get a quick win, which builds momentum and confidence.
On the other hand, focusing on more urgent areas can feel more meaningful and make a bigger splash.
I usually focus on creativity and music because they’re closely tied to my values and passions. But whatever you decide, don’t try to tackle every part of your life all at once. Trying to care less about everything is unsustainable and probably not the best move (we should still care about some stuff lol).
Explore more:
➤ How to Narrow Your Focus
2. Find Out Why You Care
Why do you care too much about things?
Knowing the cause of a problem is the best way to create an effective solution. For example, I used to crave creative validation and approval.
I was looking for signals that told me I was worthwhile and ‘good’. I cared too much. Validation (like social metrics) is a diminishing return, meaning more “juice” is needed each time to create the same level of happiness.
But once I stopped caring, my happiness became stable. So now, I consciously remind myself everyday to stop caring so much about the number under my name.
Some other reasons for caring too much could be:
Past experiences
Unrealistic expectations
Comparison culture
Being an empath
The trick is to identify those causes and then either avoid them altogether or create custom solutions for them.
In my example, one solution is to limit and update my social media habits. How about you?
3. Make Social Media Fun Again
Social media can totally suck or it can be an amazing place that’s full of inspiration and opportunity. But both directions have a compounding effect.
So to care less, I try to make social media fun, creative and helpful (which is its core purpose, IMO). Here’s how:
Avoid negative content
Consume more inspiring stuff
Stay aware of comparisons
Use less social media
Treat social media like an art project
Detach from metrics
Although I’m far from perfect, simply practicing these healthier social media habits has helped a lot.
The better I interact with social media platforms, the less I’m impacted by their negative sides and the less I care overall.
Explore more:
➤ I Used to Hate Social Media
4. Create A More Chill Lifestyle
Becoming more chill in life is the ultimate way to care less. And it’s a core theme for my own content and brand mission — from creativity and content creation to travel and beyond.
Whenever I start from a place of chillness, I do everything better. So what does a chill lifestyle even mean then? Here’s my take.
Living more chill means you’re optimizing your life for less stress, negativity and worry. And it just takes some intention and practice.
So here are some quick tips that always help me stay chill:
Stack the deck. Create a chill context in your life by meeting more relaxed people, creating relaxing spaces in your home and consuming more chill content.
Go with the flow more. The less I try to control everything and simply accept things by going with the flow, the more relaxed I am.
Start meditating. Meditation rewires your brain and helps you care less. Here’s my meditation routine for clarity and creativity.
Prioritize your passions. In my optimistic view, doing more of what makes you happy is a simple way to become more carefree and stoked in life.
Have less. This means becoming more minimalist. Because the more stuff you have, the more stuff you have to worry or care about.
Stop aiming for perfection. Perfectionism is the villain to creativity, happiness and carefreeness. So recognizing this and avoiding it is important work.
5. Adopt An Adventurer’s Mindset
A true adventurer doesn’t care so much about the destination as they do the journey.
Even then, they go with the wind.
So as cliché as it sounds, detach from outcomes and become more process-oriented. Put another way, love the journey and all of its ups and downs. Destinations are fun for a moment, but then they get boring.
It’s like the end of a good movie. It’s cathartic and feels good. But quickly, you’re looking for the next title.
So appreciate the steps and milestones along the way. And care less about where they're heading to.
Here are some ways I maintain my own adventurer’s mindset:
Loosen expectations — set more realistic timelines for goals
Fall in love with change and be open to new directions or spontaneity
Assume less and let go of how you think things should happen
Travel more — travel teaches patience and letting go
Explore more:
➤ Unlock Your Adventure Mindset
6. Avoid Dogma
The less dogmatic I am, the less I care. I’m not as attached to any one idea or way of being. If some belief of mine is “attacked”, I'm more curious than upset.
I’m not perfect, but this is the goal.
Detachment from dogma keeps you open to new discoveries, insights and opportunities. If you’re ever pulled in a new direction or proven wrong by some new evidence or experience, be ready to explore that new angle.
Less dogma means less judgment and more willingness to try new strategies and succeed quicker.
For example, using my music, the less I care about sticking to one specific genre or style, the more fun, creative and authentic I feel. It’s less restriction and more carefreeness.
So here’s how I avoid stubborn thinking in life, creativity and thinking:
Stay aware of current dogmas
Listen > speaking
Be a neutral observer
Be a learner, study multiple subjects
Practice detachment
Put yourself in other’s shoes
Challenge dogmas with evidence
7. Become Like Bamboo
““The bamboo that bends is stronger than the oak that resists.””
This is one of my favorite quotes. It’s a Japanese proverb and it hits in all the right places.
It means that being flexible makes you stronger and more resilient than being stubborn. And flexibility is a core trait of a carefree personality. So, be like bamboo.
Bend, don’t break at the first sign of contradiction, stress or disagreement. The environment will always be there with heavy winds. So you may as well learn to sway with them.
There’s a reason that adaptability is an evolutionary trait.
Okay, enough with the metaphors.
But in all seriousness, if you want to care less about the (often) stupid things that rob our energy, then try to become more flexible in life.
You’ll be stronger for it.
8. Love Who You Are
I used to want to be someone else. I thought my ideas weren’t good enough and my quirks were too strange. I always imagined some future ‘perfect’ version of myself who had it all figured out.
But your weirdness, nuances, mistakes and unique story is exactly what sets you apart from anyone else.
The more I embrace who I really am, the better I do and the less I care overall.
A lot of my desire to change stemmed from caring too much (about what others think, about failing, about succeeding…about everything).
The more I embrace who I am — my quirks and all — the less I care about all that noise. I can show up everyday being exactly who I want and need to be. It’s liberating.
So here are some quick tips to love who you are:
Define what your quirks are — what makes you authentic?
Find more friends who you’re comfortable being yourself around
What factors prevent you from embracing yourself?
Don’t measure your self worth using social media
Practice self care
Explore more:
➤ Embrace Your Weird
9. Do More Hard Stuff
The more I break past comfort zones, the less I care. The harder stuff I do, the harder it is for me to feel defeated and care about the little things.
For example, talking to a camera used to make me care way too much about so many things. I didn’t like my voice, I didn’t think I was “good looking” enough, I didn’t speak clear enough, my ideas felt bland and moot…the list goes on.
But the more I do the hard thing of talking to a camera, the less I care about all those stupid reasons I had for never doing it in the first place.
I’ve realized an interesting correlation between discomfort and not caring. The more stuff I do in my life that’s uncomfortable, the less I care overall.
From traveling to facing my fears, doing more hard stuff makes me feel a sense of pride and liberation from the thing that used to keep me in a box.
Some of the greatest comforts in life (like not caring) come after periods of great discomfort. So practice that and learn to let go more often.
Explore more:
➤ How I Embrace Challenges
10. Practice Big Picture Thinking
Big picture thinking is when you zoom out to see the whole situation — not just the details or the small parts of something larger.
It’s the art of not losing the forest for the trees. And it’s a solid way to stop caring so much.
Often, when I care too much, it’s because of something tiny that doesn’t really matter. Actually, it’s usually a culmination of many tiny things, which makes it all feel much bigger than it really is.
But the point is this: those tiny things, as many as there may be, are not the bigger picture.
The bigger picture doesn’t care about the day-to-day, the mistakes, the struggles or the nuances. It’s zoomed out and sees everything as it truly is.
So I like to borrow this perspective in my own life as a way to reset myself and stop caring so much. Here’s how:
Have more realistic timelines
Stay aware and intentional of zooming out at least once a day
Reflect on past achievements and personal growth
Celebrate the little wins
Focus on checkpoints, not finish lines
Remember your why
11. Meditate
Meditation is probably one of the most effective ways to care less.
It’s completely rewired my brain and has helped me to live more mindfully and in the present moment. I’m able to let go, detach, worry less and keep calm.
So as broken-record as it sounds, don’t skip over this tip. Give it an honest try (for longer than just a couple days).
You may start with barely being able to sit still for four minutes. But if you keep at it, that four minutes will quickly feel like 2 minutes. And so on.
It’s like a muscle. The more you stretch it or strengthen it, the more flexible and strong it becomes.
Meditation gives me a sense of control. And when I feel in control of my surroundings, my reactions to life become quieter. Ultimately, I care less.
You should try it. :)
Here are some of my favorite tips for meditating:
Start small with short meditations
Create a meditation space
Active your senses — use sounds, lighting and scents
Try different meditation styles to find your favorite
Research the benefits of meditation
Stay consistent
Stay patient
Don’t look for results
Don’t feel bad about ‘bad’ meditations — there are no bad meditations
12. Distract Your Cares
Imagine your cares were a dog. In full form, tail and all.
Now, imagine:
Squirrel!
That’s what we’re trying to do here.
The idea is to distract your cares by doing something else entirely — something that piques your interest and holds your attention. And it’s not as hard as it sounds either!
It’s like taking a break or stepping away from your work. Replacing your cares with another less stressful stimulus is a quick way to stop caring so much in the moment. This is especially good when it’s something related to your personal goals or vision.
So here are some common squirrels I like to use to distract my own cares:
Listen to chill music
Go for an aimless drive
Exercise
Find new hobbies
Meditate
Later ✌️
Learning how to stop caring so much is an awesome goal. In my own life, the less I care, the more creative, authentic and happier I am.
Some of my favorite ways to care less are starting small and focused, using social media better, having an adventurer's mindset, avoiding dogma and meditating.
But whatever strategy you end up using, remember to stay patient and don’t worry about being perfect with this carefree lifestyle.
Cares will always be there. The goal is to simply lessen their severity and shorten their duration.
Want More? Nice. Here’s More.
